Thursday, June 27, 2002

I can't link to tonight's Daily Show, but Jon Stewart nailed this pledge of allegiance issue:

The plaintiff, a California man, Michael A. Newdow (hereafter known as "Get 'im!") is an atheist who objected that his second grade daughter had to listen to the pledge. In an interview on [CNN] Newdow explained how he came up with the idea to file the suit saying, "One day I was just looking at some coins. That's what brought this up. I saw 'In God We Trust' on my coins. I said, 'I don't trust in God, What is this?'" [Stewart adds] So then I thought, "How can I drag my six-year-old daughter into my misguided rage?"

. . . Now this brings up an interesting point. The 'Under God' statement from the pledge of allegiance does technically violate the separation of church and state. But you know what? So what? . . .

Yes, you're right. Technically, boys should be allowed to play on the girls field hockey team. Yes, tecnically, coffee is very hot, and people should write "Don't spill this on yourself!" . . . You don't like "In God We Trust" on the money? I got a new slogan for you on the money, "Suck it up," Put that on the money and stop wasting our time with lawsuits, because you know what, you're never going to find a lawyer to go, "That's a dumb idea, to sue."


Precisely.

We are supposed to believe in and practice tolerance in this country. And that includes the atheists among us, and the Muslims and the voodooists. If I live in a Jewish ghetto, I've got no business bitching because I see the Star of David everywhere. I just start wishing people "Happy Hannukah!" and get used to the stores being closed on Saturday. It's a big, free country. Shop around. If you don't like it where you are, move, but don't be a jerk and demand that everyone else change to suit you. It's stupid, selfish and just unamerican. If you can't be happy because other people say "under God" in the pledge of allegiance, its not them who have the problem. You need a shrink to treat your obsessive-compulsive disorder.

It's the same with environmentalists who think their "wilderness experience" is ruined because they see some ATV tracks or a cow pie or two. If you can't enjoy the great outdoors if there's a jet contrail across the sky, grow up and get a life. But don't waste everybody else's time, money and enjoyment by filing lawsuits to get your own way. Didn't you ever go to kindergarten?

A few years ago, a Jewish family in Salt Lake City sued the school district because the school choir to which their daughter belonged was singing Christmas songs, although they weren't explicitly Christian lyrics. I remember thinking about what that taught their daughter. "See the world around you as hostile. Always be on alert for something to be offended by, and when you find it. use force to humiliate the rest of the community and teach them not to mess with you." Of course, don't expect your daughter to have many friends afterwards, or to ever feel accepted.

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